| Funny Aprons for Your Day's Fun
April 2, 2009 at 8:43 am
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| Vikram kuamr asked: How do you make aprons into funny aprons? Well, first of all, you need to know who likes aprons in the first place. Some might think that aprons are only used by women but actually there are plenty of men who use aprons too. Remember, most of the first-class hotels and restaurants have male chefs so these are the types of people who need to use aprons as part of their trade. But, funny aprons are quite innovative isn't it? The problem with trying to market funny aprons as really funny stuffs is that what makes it funny to one person does not have to count as funny to another. So you need to be extra careful about humor, in case someone gets offended by your little joke. But how do you go about marketing your funny aprons as really funny stuff the safer way? More so, stick to jokes that chefs or cooks really would find funny? For one, you could have a picture in the front of your funny apron showing a cook licking the ladle of a near-empty pot. Add some good stuffs or messages emblazoned under that picture saying “Chef’s Privilege.” Most people who cook on a regular basis could probably identify with such funny aprons as really funny stuff. Or, a picture of two chefs looking puzzled as to what some herb bottles are saying, then another picture under that showing one chef dumping the contents into a huge pot and saying to the other chef “Take a chance – life is short!”? Wouldn’t that be really funny without being offensive? How about this one: a picture of a chef in a Superman outfit, busy cooking? Again, add some message then under it saying “Even Superman has to eat sometime.” You see, some funny aprons express our frustration at how hard it is to cook some dishes. Take this one: a chef scratching his head and frowning as he reads a cookbook. This could be accompanied by a message saying “Sometimes, learning to cook is like learning to read a foreign language” then followed by another picture showing the same chef consulting a dictionary. Here’s another one: a chef lugs around a big basket full of golf balls and another chef asks him “What are those for?” The first chef then answers “It takes a lot of balls to cook the way I do.” For animal advocates on the other hand, it would probably haul you to court for breaking animal cruelty laws with this. But a really funny joke would show a chef holding a squawling cat by the tail over a boiling pot, then telling his junior cook “it’s a chef thing, you wouldn’t understand.” Consider the chefs' darker side teasers, and some funny aprons can express this portrayal using a funny apron showing a chef hiding a huge butcher knife behind his back and telling the world “Just agree with everything I say, okay?” As you can see, the really funny stuff has to be creative without being crude. To be funny or create funny aprons, you need wit and a working knowledge of the travails that all cooks and chefs go through – that will help you think up really funny stuff to place on your funny aprons. Powered by HI-RanK Promotion |
| Why "cocky and Funny" Attract Women?
April 2, 2009 at 8:05 am
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|  Alex Coulson asked: Why “Cocky and Funny” Attract Women? Are you aware of the ways of attracting women? May be you already have some great ideas to pull women towards you, still some more of those are always welcome! For most boys, it is habitual to say that being cocky and funny does not only mean to be a gentleman but it also shows the bad side. If you just consider this from the other end, it seems to be an excuse for those guys who fail in attracting women towards themselves. What you need instead is to remember that you are being cocky and funny to make others laugh. While doing this, if you come to know that you are the only person laughing, and all the others are quiet, it is definitely indicative of something wrong. You will be surprised to know that most women are attracted to men who are conceited, and positive. Men, who belong to the alpha category, do have an exceptional power to attract women. It has been found that these types of men are aware of the tactics of making a woman laugh, and have a good sense of humor, rather than being cocky and funny. However, for men who are only expert in kissing, and ******* up women for them, there is no other way out rather than being lonely. While talking about attracting women, the cocky and funny materials inside you should be in a proper ratio. Women are attracted till the moment they are able to digest your cockiness. If it goes out of their tolerance, then the situation seems to be nothing better than arrogance to them. We all know that too much of everything is not good, and the same thing happens when your cockiness goes beyond the level. Eventually, women are deterred from talking to you. Women will just fall on you when they get a good mixture of jokes, and haughtiness from your cocky and funny behavior. It is not necessary to have a great outlook all the time; the main thing is your body language, rather than attitude. While talking, girls do follow your tone, your verbal communication, and your eyes. The movement of your eyes plays an important role while talking to a girl. They are capable of making the difference between a positive man, and a man who is quite nervous. Being cocky and funny from the deep of your heart attracts a woman, instead of acting in front of her. Women are attracted to men who know how to play, and at the same time is cocky and funny. It attracts a woman once you manage to present both of the activities together because, it helps to decrease your conceit, and increase your appeal. When men are able to strike equilibrium between their arrogance in the exact ratio then they are able to attract a woman. Instead of answering all the questions asked by the girl, try answering a few of them to yourself, and change focusing on fun emotions. If you manage to point out a subject that chills a woman or suits her, then you have the game half won. Being cocky and funny should not mean that you are only trying to end up in *** with her, it is rather about impressing upon the woman. Watch FREE hidden camera pickup videos and discover how to approach, meet and get dates with attractive women at the shopping mall, the park, even the street! http://tinyurl.com/4yruqg Powered by HI-RanK Promotion |
| How Many Bad Habits Can A Good Person Have?
April 2, 2009 at 1:38 am
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|  Knight Pierce Hirst asked: Hopefully confessing bad habits makes us better people. My first confession is spell check had to remind me habit is spelled with one “B”. According to behavioral scientists, it takes three weeks to “change the way you do something” and to be successful you have to replace the bad way with a good way. That was the way I dated when I was a teenager. Although John was the last, date replacement, my husband has been a bad influence on me. He’s the one who’s usually late. I find something to do to keep busy while I’m waiting for him, then he finds something to do while he’s waiting for me to finish what I started. This goes on until one of us gives in so we don’t miss whatever it is we’re already late for. It’s hard for us to give in because we both want to be right. Why not? Our country is founded on a bill of rights. I know speeding isn’t right, but my car was made in 1969. I get excited when I can keep up with cars going seventy mph. It’s the only time in my life I get to be in the fast lane. Bad language isn’t one of my problems, but I’ve overheard conversations where the F-word is used as an adjective, adverb, verb and noun. I’ve been tempted to ask if they talked that way if front of their mothers, but then I’d be called the mother version of the F-word. Doctors say it’s okay to have one or two alcoholic beverages a day - that people who drink in moderation have fewer heart attacks and strokes. That makes me feel better about my martinis. I should. My drink of choice contains a green vegetable. It was my choice to try to help a friend get organized. I suggested she make a list each morning of what she had to do, but somehow I created a monster. My friend assigns specific times for each thing on her list. If she sneezes, she gets behind schedule. If she gets behind schedule, she gets depressed. If she gets depressed, my good intention turns the rest of her day into a bad day. I’m trying to be a better person. I’ve given up coffee and smoking. I’ve tried to reduce stress and increase sleep. I’m just trying for more good habits - not a nun’s outfit. Powered by HI-RanK Promotion |
| Doing Business in Germany is No Joke!
April 1, 2009 at 7:01 pm
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|  Matthew MacLachlan asked: Germany has a tradition of trading with the UK, but entering this market is not easy. The Germans have a reputation for being difficult customers - demanding specifications and exacting delivery standards - so is it worth the effort? The answer is YES, providing you have the right product and are prepared to do the necessary groundwork. The Germans believe in doing business with established partners, so once you have built up the necessary trust, you can expect a long relationship. The 81m Germans have a high disposable income and like good quality products. So what must you do? Start with your product. It has to be right for the German market. “Me too” products are not successful unless they have a definite price advantage. Your goods need to be of high quality and technically sound. They need to carry a CE mark and it pays to have them certified by the appropriate German standards agency, although this is not strictly essential. You must judge whether the additional cost and time are worth it. Now sell it. Business in Germany is done primarily through agents; you need to find a good one, who covers the area of Germany you are targeting. Here you need professional help from an Independent Consultant, Business Link or Chamber of Commerce. Germany is fanatical about delivery dates, you should deliver on the day specified, too early gives storage problems, too late holds up production. Never agree to impossible deadlines - you only get one chance. What about language? Most senior managers in Germany can speak English but will not do so in a business situation. You cannot become fluent overnight but your agent may help with interpreting. Better still, start learning the pleasantries and employ at least one fluent German speaker in your company. He or she can then deal directly with customers who call you for advice or help - and they will. Business in Germany is serious, do not joke about your product or company, if you do, they laugh politely but you will lose a customer. So, the essentials for entering the market are; a good product to the correct standards, the ability to meet delivery dates, a serious attitude to business and the ability to communicate in German. Above all, keep the information to agents and customers flowing - communication is the key to success. Original article at www.intercultural-training.co.uk Powered by HI-RanK Promotion |
| Funny is Money
April 1, 2009 at 7:01 pm
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| Thom McFadden asked: ef=”http://lifestand.com/articles/funny-is-money” title=”Permanent Link to Funny is Money”>Funny is Money Today let's chat about why funny is money…and break this down. CHA-HA-HA-CHING!In any relationship, be it professional or personal, humor can be part of the glue that holds it together and moves it forward. Making a customer laugh can get a waitress a bigger tip. A humorous salesman can relax the customers and make them less critical, hostile or aggressive. For actors, the ability to make others laugh can be essential in getting ahead - in casting sessions, the actor most likely to book the part is the actor with a sense of humor because he will be fun to work with on the set. With friends, family or spouses, humor can disarm a tense situation and lead to a more relaxed environment where honest communication is possible. When you make other people laugh you, relax them… and yourself. BENEFITS OF HUMOR* Humor is health…… physically, mentally, and emotionally If you've ever had a good belly laugh and felt GREAT afterwards, then you understand the physical effect of humor on your mental and emotional state. And, since the physical act of laughter also has great health benefits, when you make others laugh they instinctively know you are good for them. Laughter causes the full action of the diaphragm, thus benefiting the whole cardiovascular system, because of the amount of oxygen taken in during laughter. Endorphins kick in, boosting your mood whether you like it or not. And, during laughter, the whole body is revitalized by an internal massage! When you laugh, you can't help but feel better; your body won't have it any other way. *Humor is empowerment…Because when you are funny, it gives the appearance of being in control of the situation. This puts people at ease. "OK!" you say, "sounds good, but how do I get to be funny?" BEING FUNNYThink funny! Humor is easier to recognize than to analyze. Who makes you laugh? Imagine their face now. Doesn't just thinking about them make you feel good? So, be like a writer. Writers are told to write about what they know; laugh about what you know. Look at life with your eyes wide open. Observe yourself or anything closely enough, and you'll soon find something funny about it - guaranteed! Humor can be from any source, from anything, and from anyone. It's a universal language, which can be adapted to any situation. Then share your humor! Tell your latest joke - share a funny story. I always make my students learn to tell three jokes so they can understand rhythm and timing, they also learn to externalize their humor (you will get more laughter if you are animated so get your hands and face involved), and they've always got at least a joke handy if they don't know what else to say. Choose the type of humor that stretches your comfort zone. But protect yourself and be tasteful: Swearing is just a chicken sh*t way to shock the mind. REVEALING HUMORTo reveal humor you need to know the three different flows of rhythm that run through your body: flying, flowing, and molding. If you're familiar with the television series Seinfeld, you find all three. The entrepreneurial neighbor, Kramer, is flying. His movements are staccato (sharp, snappy); he's all over the place. Jerry Seinfeld is flowing. Everything rolls off his tongue, and his rhythm is legato (smooth uninterrupted movements). And hapless George Costanza…well, he's molding. Molding demonstrates the least motion of the three types of energy. Someone who is molding stands in one place, acting as the fulcrum of the energy that they project to the audience. Try it yourself: model Kramer's rhythm. Make bird-like, staccato movements. Fly in your living room! Feel the emotion that is aroused. You'll start talking faster and gesturing more. Or try flowing like Jerry with uninterrupted, legato movements. See how charming you become. Literally float your body around as you talk and move like you're in a swimming pool. You don't have to do much to experience George's rhythm. Simply imagine you are encased in clay and feel the emotional energy it takes to bust out of your comfort zone. As for Elaine, what rhythm do you think she reveals? Go through all three and see which one fits her best. Now, decide which rhythm tickles your funny zone. Remember Actor for Realers: he who laughs last, lasts! Be Bop! Share and Enjoy:This article is syndicated by LifeStand.com Powered by HI-RanK Promotion |
| The Serious Art Of Writing Humor
April 1, 2009 at 6:27 pm
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|  Thejendra Sreenivas asked: It has often been said that everyone likes humor and laughter on our planet. Well maybe not everyone, but almost every person who is normal will like humor provided someone else makes them laugh. And you can always enjoy reading a funny article or book written by somebody. But have you ever considered writing a funny article yourself, or maybe even write a funny book sometime? Even if you know how to write regular articles and books the very thought of writing something funny and showing it to others can turn your blood cold or make your hair stand straight. There are plenty of writers on our planet who can write countless topics in a serious, straightforward manner. But very few know how to add one magical component into their writing to make it more palatable and enjoyable. And that magical component is humor. If you want your writing to be enjoyed by your intended audience then you must add an acceptable dose of clean humor into it. It is the lack of humor that makes most articles and books tasteless even if it contains useful stuff. Writing about any serious topic you are familiar with is perhaps easy, but adding humor to it is very difficult and sometimes even dangerous if you take too many liberties. Hence you must learn some basic rules if you want to write humor and make your stuff enjoyable. And those top secret tips are outlined below. 1. The first rule for anyone who want to write humor is to become bold. Contrary to what most people think humor writers are actually very brave people. You need to develop a thick skin, nerves of steel and become brave slowly day by day. You cannot be funny if you are scared to poke fun at things, issues, people, etc. And you can’t be funny if you’re afraid of embarrassing yourself or lampooning a famous personality. Verbally anyone can be funny, but it takes guts to put the same in writing and let the public read, and maybe the entire world see it. So humorists need a lot of courage to write and publish something funny about an issue, person or a concept. 2. A humorous person has no limit on what he or she can think or write about. You must be able to think in atrocious, ridiculous, crazy, illogical and nonsense terms. Modern management consultants call this thinking out of the box, but I call it old fashioned creativity and humor that has existed from centuries. 3. What is important is that you should make your readers think what you have written is funny. But a person who writes humor you need not look funny, act funny or make goofy antics. You should become a person that nobody would suspect of writing funny and witty stuff. You can be a serious type of person and yet have the ability to write fantastic humor. This adds more spice and an aura of mystery to your personality. 4. Most people think writing humor is simply about saying and writing jokes about other people. But this is only partially true. Top humorists mainly make fun of themselves and not about someone. The best humor is always self directed. Direct the humor towards yourself that way you will not annoy anyone. People will laugh if you make fun of yourself, but they may be outraged if you make fun of them. The most important thing about writing humor is to allow your readers to laugh at you and with you, and then optionally at themselves. 5. Unless your article is for MAD magazine or a pure humor or satire piece with no restrictions, there are various do’s and don’ts that one should follow when writing humor. Don’t use bad language. Don’t make fun of religion, caste, race, physical disabilities, gender or language of anyone. Humor in these areas can start riots on the streets or even start a war. Don’t use real names of people, friends, relatives, co-workers, etc. You will never know how they may get offended. But no one will be offended if you focus on yourself. 6. When writing humor surprise your readers. That is, don’t tell or announce upfront about your funny intention. Don’t tell the reader that they will experience something funny. Let the reader discover that for himself. Use concise, direct and uses simple words that everyone can understand. 7. It is not funny to be always funny. There is a time to be funny and there is a time NOT to be funny. And this is something you need to observe and learn. Something that is extremely funny in one place may not be understood at all in another. Something that is funny on a rowdy football stadium may sound offensive inside a religious place. And in some situations or circumstances you should not indulge in anything funny no matter how irresistible it is to write something hanky panky. 8. A piece of writing can never be final and fully funny in one go. Like a diamond it needs to trimmed, improved and polished as much as possible. You need to review it in terms of using a better sentence, a more mischievous word, rearranging the sentences, modifying to a completely different angle or deleting something that does not seem right, etc. After you think you have finished writing a humor piece revisit it after a few hours or a couple of days. Suddenly you can discover new and better ways of writing the same article that can seem vastly superior to your previous article. 9. Think wild, think crazy but at the same time be moderate so that it does not put anyone, including yourself, in trouble. Often in your enthusiasm words and sentences can flow like a mad river and you may write something horrible that you momentarily think is funny or harmless. But it could be laced with trouble when reviewed carefully. So take care to frequently pause your writing to view it from different angles and from the reader’s perspective. Then you may need to give your writing a haircut and then continue. 10. The final piece of advice is writing humor takes time. To excel in humor is a lifetime job, and is not something that you can learn in a day or two. Don’t think you can read a joke book and start writing funny stuff an hour later. You will have to teach yourself how to be funny. The process is mostly by trial and error, observing other people’s comical situations, mistakes, laughing and applying it on yourself, etc. No one can teach you exactly how to write something funny, but the possibilities of creating humor on anything and everything are limitless. Powered by HI-RanK Promotion |
| Clean Jokes are Good Anywhere
April 1, 2009 at 3:48 pm
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|  nlwest21 asked: Joseph Addison declared “One should take good care not to grow too wise for so great a pleasure of life as laughter.” Do you know a lot of your coworkers in your office might think there to old or wise to take a moment to laugh while there at work. This doesn’t sound like good office behavior but we can fix it with good clean jokes that you can use without breaking any office rules. If many of you were asked “What is a joke?” Would you be able to directly answer the question? Most of us would probably answer this question with a joke. Seems like a joke isn’t quite something you just hear but experience instead - the experience in most cases called laughter. Now some of you are thinking that every time you heard a joke you didn’t always experience laughter. This maybe because the jokes was crude or not crude enough depending on what your preference is. If your like me most crude jokes are offending whether I laugh or not. But not to worry there are many resources out there for less crude jokes referred to as clean jokes as opposed to the opposite called dirty jokes. Now we can also take a look at humor. What is humor you ask? Humor is an emotion you feel maybe when there is something funny happen or even when see some thing happen and laugh at it even if its not funny. This is called finding the humor. Just like jokes different types of humor can be clean or dirty. Why do we categorize them clean and dirty? Well the are lots of reasons but the most obvious reason is clean jokes normally fall into the G to GP rating area that are safe for a young audience. Why do we need clean jokes? Clean jokes are important because everybody needs a laugh sometimes. In some places such as work or family oriented gatherings dirty jokes are viewed as inappropriate. The great thing about finding good clean jokes is that you can share them with other people without the fear of offending them in any way. In fact you may just be able to put a smile on each of their faces. The next time you find a great clean joke pin it up in your office or e-mail to all of your friends and family. Powered by HI-RanK Promotion |
| A Treasure Chest for People Who Love Funny Clothing
April 1, 2009 at 1:05 pm
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|  Michael D'Elena asked: I have always been a big fan of funny clothing. I am always on the look out for all types of funny clothing, especially when I am out of town. You see, funny t-shirt are the thing in our city and practically everybody has one. Well this has become a disadvantage, at least in my own point of view. I just **** bumping into someone with an exact same shirt as mine. So I like to buy my funny clothing somewhere outside the city; but only until I happened upon a wonderful website. It's called recklessts.com. You open the page and you're greeted with amazing funny tees. It's practically a treasure chest for me. What is even better about the site is that you don't only get funny tees, but you get original funny t-shirts. Now I don't have to worry about embarrassing encounters with people wearing identical shirts. Now let me stress this—recklessts.com offers not only unique funny tees but hilarious tees at that. By this I mean really funny shirts. Now you'll have people laughing out loud. You can't get any cooler than that. And because they're unique, you are assured that you are not wearing yet another old joke. Most of their humorous T-shirts are not very wholesome. Well, this is the exact reason why I like them. Whenever my Mom gives me "her look," I simply say," Mom, we call that wit." Don't get the wrong idea. Recklessts.com is not all about t-shirts. As a matter of fact, they now offer funny hats too. Now I can have a whole new range of collection. And did I mention that they offer custom screen printing in Tempe Arizona? Not only does the website offer amazing products but it also provides great customer service. Ordering is pretty simple. You simply click on the product you wish to purchase (plus the size of your choice). After which you click on the button that says "ADD TO CART." Then the site will do the rest. You will be automatically transferred to PayPal's shopping cart where you only have to enter your shipping information and the payment method of your choice and you're done with the transaction. If you still find this simple procedure a hassle, you hold the option of calling Recklessts.com via telephone no. (480) 678-4488. Another wonderful thing about Recklessts.com is its Return Policy. The site guarantees refund for shirts that are returned unworn and unwashed within 30 days of purchase. This is one feature I don't need though. I have always been satisfied by the shirts I order from the site. I find the site's privacy policy more important. You see, I am a security buff. I worry about identity thieves who manage to steal from people's credit card accounts. Credit card security is one area where I lose my sense of humor. It's all business for me. It's a good thing Recklessts.com uses PayPal, a secure network that is well worth my trust. Powered by HI-RanK Promotion | | |  |
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